Friday, February 08, 2013

The cool but warm Swedes


  Any of my friends who have travelled with me would be able to tell I am more interested in observing how people in a foreign place live and behave than visiting landmarks and attractions. If you ask me what in my ten-day trip in Sweden is the most memorable, I would say it is the trust and helpfulness of the people.

  Perhaps Scandinavians are well known for their stoicism. Any visitor who expects a welcome with a big smile and warm hug is likely to be disappointed. But as a tourist I found the Swedes are indeed very helpful despite their apparent coolness. When I moved in a hostel in Malmö on my very first day in the country, I was greeted by a big, tall, middle-aged man in a suit, with his face so emotionless while he talked to me that I might otherwise feel like being greeted at the hospital reception. Yet the content of his speech, his responsiveness to my questions soon proved he was very generous in giving help. The level of detail when he showed me how to use the washing machine and dryer on the second day showed remarkable patience.

  Of course one person working in the tourism industry cannot be representative. I took my little “social experiment” of opening a map wide on the streets conspicuously looking for directions yielded an interesting unscientific finding - the Swedes are very willing to help strangers but they are also very careful to respect your capability. If you do not ask for assistance they would not interrupt your effort to find your own way but once you ask they would nicely give you clear directions. This made me, as a foreigner from a rather individualistic metropolitan culture, feel at great ease.  I did not ask anyone for directions in Malmö because the map I had was sufficiently detailed and the city, despite being the third biggest in the nation, was small enough for me to get around easily. But a few requests for help with directions in Gothenburg and Stockholm gave me this impression of Swedish helpfulness and friendliness once approached. One lady in Gothenburg who answered a question from me and my travel companions about the ferry routes had quite a long chat with one of us, while another in Stockholm who showed me the way to the City Hall also extended very warm welcome to me as we walked together.

  On my two inter-city trips in the country I rode on buses with discounted student tickets, for which I was only eligible with a recognised international student card (I bought it for £9 before setting off for this trip). However on neither of the trips did the driver check my student identification! They just trusted me, or, one could argue that they were lazy. (Two other observations of bus rides in Sweden were, first, I encountered two Chinese drivers in Malmö, and second, a practice which perplexed me, they don’t allow passengers to pay on board – You have to get a ticket from a sales point such as a convenient store, a train station or a hostel before boarding.)

  The most impressive welcome I received was from Vasil, a Malmö resident who moved to Sweden from Macedonia many years ago. He was a retired restaurant owner living in one of the nice apartments nearby the modern landmark of the Turning Torso. I asked him to take a picture for me as he was going for a walk on the seaside with his puppy. After a pleasant chat he was so hospitable to invite me to his home, treated me with coffee, biscuits, made Macedonia Christmas food sarna with Swedish cabbage Kåldolmar for me, and even gave me a box of chocolate as a New Year present when I left! After returning to Bristol a girl friend of mine warned me, “You shouldn't have gone to an unknown man’s home!” I agreed that she did have a point, and perhaps I was lucky to have met a pure-hearted new friend. But in that country where I felt so much trust among people and saw the friendly exchanges between Vasil and his neighbours my metropolitan suspicion of strangers just disappeared when I received such a warm invitation.

  The Swedes’ courtesy was also impressive. No pushing around on the streets, for sure, not even in the busy shopping areas in Stockholm on Saturday. They would even offer places to strangers! One middle-age lady sitting in a crowded café indicated to me an empty seat next to her when she saw me looking for a place to sit down. An old lady I encountered in the lavatory of a museum offered me to go first, even she was obviously much older than me and was in front of me in the line! Of course I would be too embarrassed to take that offer so I thanked her and asked her to go first. At one point while I was walking in the peaceful and quite district of Östermalm in Stockholm, a question came to my mind: How am I going to re-adapt to the pushing crowd in Hong Kong when I go home?...

  Having said that the Swedes exhibit trust, honesty and helpfulness, tourists still have to be alert while travelling. One exception I encountered on this trip took place in a small convenience store which sold things like postcards and snacks. The shopkeeper did not look Swedish and I have no idea where he was from. Apparently betting that a foreigner would not know the postage fee there, he tried to cheat 6 kronas from me when I asked for three stamps (One krona is equivalent to roughly 10 British pence). After I declined to buy those stamps and continued with the purchase of one postcard, he still tried to cheat 2 kronas from me when giving me the change and gave me the correct change only after I pointed out it was short of 2 kronas - without any apology or any apologetic expression. He was unlucky to have encountered a tourist who was already spending her ninth day in the country and had managed to recognise all the coins of different values!

My Swedish treat
A New Year gift from my Malmö host

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